The challenge: to cook all the 115 recipes from the Official Thug Kitchen Cookbook in exactly 365 days. It’s going well, but there’s only 14 days left, and still 15 recipes to go.

I’m counting down the days now. Hell, I’m counting down the hours.

Not for the challenge, but until the barfing begins. Yes, the barfing. To explain; I woke up to my kid hurling on the pillow right next to my face. He’s got a stomach bug, and I have a bad…and I mean BAD…feeling that it’s only a matter of time before I get it too. With so few days left for the recipes already, I don’t think being out of action for 24-48 hours will help the cause.

So today we are kicking some salad dressings’ asses.

Turn to page 36 of your mother-effin’ cookbook. (What book? This book.)

Basic Thug Kitchen Vinaigrette

This shit is easy to make, and a pleasure to eat. It’s got just the right amount of tanginess, and will give you low-level heart burn if you eat it on a salad with LOADS of raw onion. The raw onion will also give you fantastic Fuck Off Breath, so I recommend this for blind dates that are going wrong.

Toasted Sesame Dressing

I’d never really tried toasted sesame oil before encountering Thug Kitchen recipes. I decided I loved sesame oil when I first made the grilled eggplant with soba noodles. Honestly, that recipe is so good my mouth waters whenever I think of it. Salivation city!

The recipe for toasted sesame dressing is easy to make. Beyond easy. And I love it.

Yum. It works well on most salads. I haven’t yet found any combos that it doesn’t suit.

Roasted Carrot and Cumin Dressing

Out of all the Thug Kitchen salad dressing recipes this was the most time-consuming as it takes a little oven time to roast the carrots. But if you’ve got the oven on already for something else then it’s the perfect time to pop this in alongside. (or ‘ride shotgun’ like the Thugs like to say.) Then you’re sorted for all your dressing needs.

I read the recipe too quickly, rushing I guess, and didn’t realise that the cumin was meant to be sprinkled on the carrots BEFORE they went in the oven, not just blended in with everything AFTER. Whoops. I bet it would add a depth of flavour if the cumin went in the oven with the carrots, so I’ll try it the right way next time. But this way tasted damn delicious too. It was sort of sweet (probably the orange juice) but also savoury (the cumin and salt) It’s a heavier dressing than the sesame and the vinaigrette, so is more of a spoon-it-on, than a drizzle-from-a-bottle sort of dressing. Also, don’t be surprised if you find yourself licking the dressing bowl.

Tahini Dressing

This dressing. If this shit was in a bottle it would need some serious small print warning people just how addictive it is.

Garlic on its own. Yum.

Lemon on its own. Mostly alright.

Tahini on its own. Meh.

But together, OH MY THUG, this shit is divine!

The tahini dressing is definitely my favourite. I feel like I don’t have a choice in the matter. There’s a little tahini monster inside my head screaming “ADDICTION!” and holding a small gun to my head. I would drizzle that shit on anything. It’s amazing in the spiced chickpea wraps as well. You can rely on that dressing to ties all the good shit together, just like the rug does in the Big Lebowsky’s living room.

So now I find myself with 11 recipes left to do, and a belly full of salad. Hopefully I won’t catch whatever bug my son has got, or at least this 4-recipes-for-the-price-of-one blog will help buy me a little time.

Now go pour some tahini dressing straight in your mouth. I assure you, it’s worth it.