Ready to Take a Leak? (with a parsnip?)

Okay here we go. New cookbook BRAVE NEW MEAL is out!! I’m going to cook and blog the whole thing in a year. (I hope I make it, I’ve got other shit to do too.)

124 recipes in 365 days.
That’s about a recipe every 3 days.

I will pretend that it’s the 1st December to keep it easier to remember when I need to be done by, so please rewind the clock in your mind by a day. What were you doing this time yesterday? Brushing your teeth? Shove some toothpaste in your mouth and let’s go!

Fun fact of the day: Did you know it’s easier to imagine you’re brushing your teeth if you have toothpaste in your mouth, than if you don’t? Yes, I know. I am full of wisdoms. Stick with me kid, and you will go far.

I decided to go with the “pale fuckers” on page 97; namely the baked parsnips and leaks.

Now, I am not one for parsnips normally. I feel like they sorta taste…sweaty. You know what I’m saying? Do you follow me on this one? So earthy that they have a background of sweat, like when you have a heavy make out sesh with someone and you accidentally end up licking their arm pit in all the commotion (come on don’t tell me I’m the only one). So I wanted to see if I’d like a dish like this. I figured if anyone could get me to appreciate a parsnip it’d be Bad Manners (previously known as Thug Kitchen).

Now, I love my family, and they love me mostly too (except when I’m singing badly and loudly in the shower) but I cannot get them to eat parsnips. My husband’s got PTSD from childhood parsnip experiences and my son is a fussy little fucker. So I decided this one was just for me. So instead of chopping five nips like the Bad Mannered crew said to do, I settled for two. I was cooking a big bad roast dinner anyway, so I knew this would work well as a side to an array of other yummy oven dishes.

Just look at that garlic…mmmmm….

I threw it in the oven and went on my merry way prepping other food.
It was only a little while later that I realised that what I’d added to the veggies wasn’t actually rosemary after all….It was tarragon. How the hell did I get tarragon in my garden?! I don’t remember planting that shizzel. Maybe it was on a day I was all hopped up on cake or something. Who knows. Oh well, too late now isn’t it? It was already in the oven, I wasn’t exactly going to start picking it out was I? Sorry Bad Manners! I really did try to get it right this time.

I pulled the leeks and parsnips out when they were done, and served them for my family. I did invite them to try some, but they both looked at me like I’d grown an extra head, or a parsnippy nose or something equally weird.

My mouth is watering just looking at these photos again. The garlic had sort of caramelised, and the leaks were done to PER-FUCKING-FECTION.

It tasted really really good. Tarragon and all. I will of course try and make this again with the rosemary instead. No sweaty armpits anywhere to be tasted.

Maybe it was the tarragon that did it, maybe it was the veg broth? Who knows, I might try and rub a little tarragon under my own arms to see if it can be used as a natural deodorant. I wonder if I’ll be able to talk anyone into doing a quick lick test for me…? Hmmm, maybe not.

But seriously, if you are on the fence about parsnips try this recipe out and give those pale fuckers a second (or third, or tenth) chance because it’s not their fault they’re as pale as they are. They are sort of like the redheaded anaemic-looking cousin of the carrot. Misunderstood, you know? As a redhead I know how that feels to be both pale and misunderstood, so I beseech you to give the parsnip another chance. It may just surprise you. (The tarragon disguised as rosemary may also surprise both you and your unsuspecting tastebuds, but that’s a whole different story. Moral of the story go chew on all the herbs and plants you can find in your garden before you use them in your dinners.)(not the inedible or poisonous ones obviously – don’t be silly)

I found myself humming the tune to ‘a whole new world’ from Aladdin while I ate this, and I just can’t figure out why I had that song stuck in my head. Hmmmm.


3 Comments Add yours

  1. Monch Weller says:

    You know, I initially thought you made that recipe book in partnership with the eponymous ska band!


    1. Camilla says:

      Yes, there’s a band called Bad Manners too right? 🙂
      Yeah Bad Manners used to be called Thug Kitchen and then they changed their name.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Monch Weller says:

        Yeah, one of the big three English ska bands — alongside Madness and The Specials. (Not really a fan of Bad Manners – I’m leaning more toward the latter two, though.)

        I see; so that’s their former name. Thank you for that wonderful bit of trivia!


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